Not broken, just bent |JACOB|

[RENESMEE CARLIE CULLEN]

The woods were coming to life as a strong wind blew by. The sound of leaves weaving in the wind, the hiss of the wild. Everything became so dark and frightening. A few drops of water fell on her pale face. Nessie did not turn a hair when the thunders growled in the dark skies, warning about the upcoming rain. It always rained in Forks and people were no longer surprised at the creepy sounds it caused. Water commenced to pour down like water fall above her. Under the leaves of a giant tree, the girl blinked few times as some drops fell into her eyes and streamed down her face. She pulled her jacket closer and wrapped her arms around her knees, rested her chin on them. Why did raindrops taste so salty? She let out a husky laugh as she questioned herself. Of course she was not crying. Crying was stupid and Renesmee Cullen was too tough to burst into tears like other girls. Maybe the skies were crying for her.

Her parents were probably quite panicked at the time when they found out their daughter was outside in such a rain. They would try to call her but they could never reach her because her phone was soaked. She did not want to see them right now. She was on the roller coaster of emotions and she could find no exit. She could not let them be worried about her. Renesmee bit her bottom lip to swallow the tears back inside. Her tears should be saved for better occasions – like her wedding or something similar – not for a boy. Seth Clearwater. That name kept on echoing in her head as much as his words did. She remembered smiling all day when she had heard that name. Now that name caused her nothing but pain. She thought his heart would forever be the place for her to hold on to. Childish – so childish of her to like him so much. Jealousy and anger. It was all because of her liking him too much. And it ruined everything – even their friendship. A smile crossed her face gently when she recalled the first time she admitted to her mother that she had had a crush on Seth. She could not have been happier than that – and she could not be in more pain than she was now. She was not upset because they fought, she was upset because what had happened after the fight. Where were they going? They were going nowhere. What were they? They were nothing, at least to each other. It was what Seth said. She did not belong with him. He claimed that. So where did she belong? Renesmee was quite sure that Seth only considered their relationship a playground, just as she did. But she had not known it would hurt this much. Everything was about to be over; she could feel it. Was she feeling what people called a heartbreak? Were they bent or broken?

She did not know. Renesmee heard herself crying out loud now

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tagged: jacob black <3
ooc: sorry it took so long. hope it's okay! love them already xD

[jacob ephraim black]

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Jacob was so tired of hurting. His heart felt like it was being broken into a million pieces. Unrequited love was always the worst. But to top it off, someone who was supposed to be his best friend was dating the girl that he loved. The girl that he was bound to for the rest of his life. He could only be angry for so long. But all he wanted to do was cry. Both Nessie and her mother Bella had left him in this state at least once before. They claimed to love him but never did, not in the way he loved them.

He knew he had to be patient with the Nessie but it broke his heart, he was unable to stand by and watch her and Seth be a happy couple. His heart could not take it. It had been bad with Bella but it was far worse with Nessie. He had imprinted on her. His life was hers, everything was hers. His whole world revolved around the girl. But she did not feel it back. She did not see him as a lover, and that killed him inside. He found it hard to be around her, to spend time with her when she clearly did not see that he loved her.

He had to get away, but he knew he could not do so in wolf form. His thoughts were too public then so he had to creep away as a human. Donning a pair of jeans and a thick shirt with a pair of walking boots he headed out. He walked through the forest as it was what he knew best. The rain did not phase him. He did not care for the clothes he wore or the watch or even the phone in his pocket. None of those things mattered to him. Only Nessie did.

He found himself walking towards the Cullen's. It was just instinct. But before he could get too far he heard crying. Frowning he walked towards the source of it and stumbled upon the one person he had on his mind. Walking closer he felt his heart beat quicken as it always did when he was around her. He just loved her, with every inch of him. But the quickening would be for naught. There would be nothing between him but him comforting her.

"Ness? Whats wrong?" His boots snapping the undergrowth as he walked through towards her. He was soaked just as she was. But she looked so much better than he did. She was beautiful in every way. He just wanted to cry. It hurt to be around her like this. Especially when she did not return his feelings, or did not see him anything more than just a brother. He soon found himself beside her and took a seat next to her. "Your soaked... C'mon you can tell me anything." He placed a warm arm around her shoulders trying to get her warm again.

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NOTES - <3
TAG - NESSIE
OUTFIT - HERE

[RENESMEE CARLIE CULLEN]

The pain grew worse with every teardrop falling down. Renesmee felt her heartbeats quickened and her breath became heavy. The girl bit her lip harder to stop the tears. Being strong for what? Being strong so that the boy she liked so much would feel okay when he said ”Lord knows we we’re going to last” to her? How ironically. She was the one who never treasured relationships, only saw them as fantasies. Now, for the first time, she was hurt because of a fantasy. She had thought people were always overdramatic about love when they lost it. She had believed that loving someone was like buying clothes – she could throw the old ones away to get better new ones. But Seth Clearwater was not clothing. He was her first love, her dearest friend and her pain. Everything about him came back in her head at once when she thought of his name again. His childish smile, his laugh, his goofy look, his warm voice, his mischievous grin. Had she been a bit less stubborn, would things had been different? Would it have been better if she had swallowed her pride to admit that she missed him? Would it have been less painful if she had apologized first? The girl bit her lips harder as a scream was eager to escape her throat. Being at a loss of words when you’ve got so much to say – it was the worst feeling in the world. Ache. A frown showed up on her face as she tasted something on her tongue. Blood. She wiped the bleeding wound on her lips with her fingers. That should be painful. But she could not feel it anymore.

Being lost in thought, she had not noticed the footsteps coming towards her until she was taken aback by a familiar voice. Jake? She muttered but all was let out of her mouth was breaths. A pale smile grew on her lips. Her superhero finally managed to find her no matter how hard she had tried to hide – as usual. Nevertheless, the smile faded quickly as it had appeared when she noticed the worries on his face. Looking away from him instantly, the girl tried to move backward but she could not since she was resting against a giant tree. She could try to run away but he wold catch up easily. So she chose to sit still, hoping that he would go away. Please, Jake. I don’t want you to see me like this. She said quietly. Renesmee Cullen was the toughest girl everyone would ever deal with. Nothing could break her down or bring her to her knees. But what she was doing was exactly opposite to what she had attempted to performed in front of everyone. Instinctively, Renesmee avoided his arm by moving a few inches away from him. Her chocolate-brown eyes stared at him with an empty look on her face. Just ignore me. I’m soaked but not going to die here. She said determinedly with a couple heavy breaths. Jake was always the one to suffer. He had suffered so much and she could not cause him any burden. Furthermore, if she fell in his arms now, she doubted she could hide anything from him. She would burst into tears right away if she felt his warmth. Weaknesses – they made her look pityful.

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tagged: jacob black <3

[jacob ephraim black]

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It was not fair. But life never was fair. If it was then he too would be an old man right now, dying happily beside his sisters. He would happily be sitting with them as he too wrinkled into nothing. He would not feel the burden of their deaths as they passed by without him even aging. He would not feel the burden of loving someone who did not want anything to do with him. All these things were life. There was no easy path for anyone. Well unless you had lots of money. But even then money could not buy love.

He sighed softly as she tried to move away from him. That was one thing he did not like. How stubborn she was. She truly was the daughter of Bella and Edward. "Ness... I'm supposed to see you like this. Now just tell me what is happening." He frowned slightly. He did not like the fact that she did not want to share with him. As much as he was pained that she had chose someone else he still loved her in a way only a wolf could love his imprintee. He still hated seeing her cry.

Dropping his arm to his side, he shook his head slightly. "You are soaked. Please just let me warm you." He tried to shuffle closer to her. "I hate seeing you cry. Tell me who upset you and I'll knock them down a few pegs.." He always would be her protector. Even now. He pushed his wet hair from his eyes and reminded himself that he would need to get it cut soon. One of the worst problems about being a wolf was this his hair grew at a ridiculous pace.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

NOTES - <3
TAG - NESSIE
OUTFIT - HERE

[RENESMEE CARLIE CULLEN]

Renesmee wished she could throw away her pride and fall in his arms to cry out loud like a child being stolen away her favourite toy. But she wanted his embrace and his comfort. It would definitely feel better if she just spitted everything out and stopped keeping things for herself. Then, she told herself that he could not always be her babysitter, her hero to wipe away her tears, help her stand up when she fell. What if he could not find her someday? Would she keep on crying if he could not wipe away her tears anymore? Her life had been easy as a breath thanks to her family and the packs. They loved her dearly and protected her from all harm. She had never suffered any pain before except when she had lost her grandfather. Fear, yes. But never pain. Her family did their best to keep her from heartbreaks. It was quite hard to believe that the one to keep her safe was the one who left the first scar in her heart. Deal with it or she would never grow up. She had to grow stronger from scars, not let them break her down and make her burst into tears like this. No, you’re not. And what happened to me is none of your business. She said, almost screamed. What had slipped out of her mouth was definitely going to hurt Jake’s feelings. There was nothing wrong about his caring for her. She was the wrong one – as usual.

Please don’t. You know my knees are weak when I’m in your arms. She shook her head continuously. The rain poured down harder. There were tastes of tears, blood and raindrops together on her tongue and they made the oddest combination ever. She was about to move away when he shuffled closer but his statement froze her. Seth had said the same thing to her more than once when she had been much younger. He had never truly knocked someone down for her but he had made her feel so happy to hear those words. Should she be happy to hear the same thing from Jake? She guessed that was the right thing to do. But how could she do the right thing when all that she wanted to do was wrong? You cannot do that for me this time, Jacob. Even if you can, it won’t make any of us relieved. She stated gently. I love you as a friend and a brother. You have always been everything I ever need. You’re the hero and I’m the damsel in distress. But that is all. I just don’t-- deserve to be with you, Jake. You don’t have to stand up for me or suffer anything for me. Her voice became shaky. A week earlier, she could have said that without hesitations when her heart had danced for Seth. Now, she was not sure if it was still true. She belonged to Jake. That was what Seth had told her. Everyone told her to listen to her heart. What was to listen when her heart was still confused?

.

tagged: jacob black <3

[jacob ephraim black]

Jacob knew that she had been growing away from him. She wanted her space more and more. It was just her own way of saying she did not want him or need him. This hurt him far more. He just wanted her to fall into his arms and allow him to comfort her but she was never one for the easy way out. Her words cut him like a knife, the way she screamed at him caused him such pain he chocked for a second unable to get a breath. "It is my business! You know what you are to me! Everything concerning you is my business!" he tried to shout back but he could not get the feeling behind it. He was still realing from the way she had spoken to him.

Everything seemed to be crumpling beneath him and it was out of his hands. It made him weak in every way. With each passing day he found himself slipping deeper into a depression. With each rejection and death it was killing him from the inside out. " please just come into my arms" his voice sounded a lot more pleading than it was meant to be. He could not help the emotion that laced him. He had been denied her for so long and all he wanted was for her to give up her stubborn ways and give in to him. He had never understood the pain of an imprint, not until these last few years. It was one of the worst things about being a wolf. Tying yourself to one person and them may or may not wanting you back.

Again her words knocked him like a tonne of bricks. But this time anger grew within him. He had never been outright angry with her before. "can you just stop with this crap?! You have no idea what you mean to me! How much I feel for you! You fling this in my face as if I am nothing! Everything I have ever done, you turn round and tell me this! I am so tired of this Renesmee! I LOVE YOU! I WANT YOU TO LOVE ME BACK BUT YOU DON'T! YOU FLAUNT SETH IN FRONT OF MY FACE AS IF IT IS NOTHING! HE KNOWS HE IS BREAKING PACK TRADITION JUST BY BEING WITH YOU BUT NONE OF YOU CARE! This isn't all about me. I just want you to understand how much you hurt me. All you words cutting me like knives." tears ran down his face, he did not even realise he was crying. He was shouting just like she had done. He felt himself getting to his feet as he had been shouting. He took a step towards her but not in a menacing way.

[RENESMEE CARLIE CULLEN]

Jacob’s words left her speechless. She knew what she was to him. She was well aware of the fact that his world revolved around her. And that was so unfair to him because he deserved to be with someone better than her – someone was more caring and understanding than she was. Fifty years had passed and she was still that carefree, cruelly innocent child. Never learned to take care of others although she always appeared to do so. Someone like that – someone like her – could not make Jacob happy when he deserved to be. She wished she had been more like her sweet, caring mother. But all that came to her mind was rebellion and selfishness. It was not a right thing when Jacob had to spend every second of his life loving and looking after a girl that did not treasured his feelings for her properly. I do know that. And I also know you should not care about me so much like this. It does no good to you. She said in a firm tone though she doubted she could stand stably on her feet for any longer. He loved unconditionally, never outright asked her to return his feelings so as not to make things uneasy for both of them. All she could do was hurting him.

Hearing him pleading her to come to his arms was appealing. It would feel so good to cry in his arms and tell him everything that was burdening her. But she was afraid of what he would do to Seth if he found out that her tears were for that boy. And it would be cruel to let him think that she could learn to love him after the heartbreak because she was still not ready for that. Had she fallen in love with him at the first place, both of them would not have had to suffer this much. There would have been happy endings for everyone. It was her that caused all the pain and sorrows. She had to be punished. She had had enough happiness – it was time for pain. Then what? You cannot comfort me forever. I will still be crying tomorrow, I will be drowning unless I learn to cope with it by myself now. Resisting. That was all she could do.

Renesmee was taken aback by his words after she had told him that he was only a friend and a brother to her. Raindrops were on his face, streaming down. It was the first time she had seen him with such honesty. Could she stop hiding from him, avoiding him? She did not know. Asking her to accept their bond in one day was too much for her. Nevertheless, his anger was understandable. Seth and her – both of them had not chosen to spare a thought for him when they had been together. She had treated him as if he was nothing to her. She could not blame him for revealing his feelings. No, Jacob. You mean so much to me. You’re someone I never want to lose. But I-- She paused, not knowing what to say anymore. She did not love him? No, she loved him. But the mention of Seth tore her apart instantly. She shakily buried her face in her hands to hide her tears. You don’t have to worry about me being with Seth anymore. Because it’s over. She muttered in shaky voice.

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tagged: jacob black <3

[jacob ephraim black]

He had not cried properly since his father had died. He had just bottled everything up. The only tears that came were at night in his dreams when all he saw was Nessie and Seth loving each other and kissing. It was the same nightmare day after day for what felt like a month now. He had never said anything but again it tore him apart. Even his dreams were reminding him of his failures. That his life was nothing, nobody was left to care for him. He had always thought he had grown up. He had become the man that his father wanted, but it was all a lie. He was just a child, he relied on people to love him but there were none. Everything was a sham and he just had to face it now. "I don't have a choice not to love you." He frowned, looking to the floor. He never regretted loving Nessie and never would but he did not have a choice. He could never love another, his path had already been chosen for him. She was to be his mate, it was pre-destined.

"I can... I'll comfort you until the day I die. I'll make it all better. Take all the pain away." He spoke form his heart. He knew he could do all these things if she would just let him. If she opened her heart to him he could take everything away. If she just learned to love him...

He frowned at her words, tears still falling down his harsh face. He instantly regretted shouting at her. There were some relief in her words but he could not take joy in them. It clicked in his head that perhaps she was crying because they broke up. "But you never will lose me." he spoke softly, his words no more than a whisper. "Ness.. I'm sorry. I know he made you happy. I just want to make you happy. I hate seeing you upset. " He felt guilty for ever taking any joy in the fact they broke up. Now that he was standing he moved towards her, trying to find a way so she would be unable to wriggle away. Sitting down beside her he sighed softly as she hid her face. He moved his arm so it was around her, his other hand rubbing her arm softly. "Let me in.." His words had a dual meaning. He just wanted to see her face, to look in her eyes and tell her everything would be okay. But it also meant let me into your heart.

[RENESMEE CARLIE CULLEN]

No choice. He did not get to choose. Had he been able to make his own decision of who to fall in love with, would he have chosen her still? No, she did not think so. Loving her was painful and heartbreaking. He should run away from her if he had a chance. But the imprinting tight the two of them together and he had to remain by her side whether she wanted him or not. She loved having him next to her but not in this way since it was so unfair to force him to suffer someone did not deserve him. As he stated that he could stay with her forever, half of her wanted to resist again and the other wanted to fall into his arms right away. He would be looking out for her until he died and nothing could take him away from her. It meant he would be hurt more and that was not something she wanted for him. Learning to open her heart to him was easy to say but hard to do. She had seen him as a friend and a brother for fifty years; thus, expecting her to change that was too much. Renesmee shook her head quietly. Expecting her to stay away from him was even more terrible. She had always been decisive but standing before him in a roller coaster of emotions, she could not make a decision. She needed time because if she opened her heart to him now, it would make him a replacement for Seth. And it was unacceptable.

His words caused the melting of her heart. Seth claimed that they would never last and Jacob assured her that she would never lose him. That was the difference between the two of them, although both of them wanted to make her happy. Her pride was yelling at her, telling her to run away when Jacob moved closer but the girl did not move an inch. As soon as his arm was wrapped around her, she felt an explosion inside her. Emotions twisted and tangled up. There was a knife cutting her soul apart but it seemed like everything was healing. The warmth covered her in the most comfortable way and the safe feeling she was given was irresistible. I hate seeing you upset. That is what he said. She muttered. Without a second thought, she slowly leaned in, rested her head against his chest just as the way she had usually done when she had been a child. Once again, Jacob was too persuasive. Let me in. Her breath stopped as she heard that. She eagerly got rid of his arm with a panicked look on her face. No. I can’t. I’m not ready. She said without looking at him. I’m not sure what I can do right now, Jake. Can we just be like the old days? I’ll be the crying child and you’ll be my dearest friend. We’ll live happily without making any decisions. Things will get back to normal.

tagged: jacob black <3

[jacob ephraim black]

He realised that what he said sounded bad. Although he had no choice he still would have chose her. Even if there was no imprint everything still would have been the same, he would still be a wolf, he would still have a dying family. But she would be the shinning light that she is now. He never once questioned what if when it came to Nessie. He loved her and wished she would just realise she loved him too. But it was just not simple like that. He understood that she needed to grow up and experiment before eventually returning to him and loving him. The only thing he had not accounted for was the period of time it would take and seths involvement. Jake could have handled human boys because he knew that they were nothing special but for Nessie to fall for one of his own pack mates... It was just not something he had prepared himself for. Partly because it was pack tradition to never go with another pack mates imprint.

He groaned slightly. "please do not compare me to him. He will never give you half of what I will give you." he sighed softly as he spoke. Although Seth did care for her it would not be a patch on how much Jacob cared for her. He smiled softly as she lent her head on his chest. A warm feeling grew within him. This was how it was meant to be. Her in his arms. When she moved away he felt the darkness creep back in. When she spoke he closed his eyes and put a hand to his face. He would never be able to just go back to being her friend. She was fully grown and his attraction to her had also grown with her. He could never just be her friend. "you know I can't.... I know your upset Ness. But I can fix that. We need to make a decision. We need to move on from just this. Each person you fall for will just hurt you because it can never be. You will only find true happiness with me... I will give you everything.."

He felt the urge to kiss her. To show her what she is missing and what she needed. Without even thinking he had put a finger beneath her chin and raised her face before leaning in to kiss her. His lips pressed softly against her own. He would never push her to be physical with him, he would be patient. However he had lost patients with her pushing him away.

[RENESMEE CARLIE CULLEN]

Everyone said that Seth did bear resemblance to his alpha. Renesmee thought it was undoubtedly right. They were both so childish and funny to everyone, protective and determined when it came to things that they loved. Thus, Jacob would be a wonderful replacement for the boy she had let slip out of her hand. If she was searching for the same kind of feelings that she had got from Seth, it was the perfect time for her to grab it. But it meant she had to hurt the one she loved and adored so dearly – Jacob Black. She had no right to pour all the pain upon him; going through heartbreak did not give her the right to hurt people without a reason. People come and go. He was the one who stayed with her through every up and down and she chose to hurt him? No, she would never do that. But wasn’t it what he wanted – her love? It would be all a lie – an appealing one. What she would love about him right now was the reflection of Seth in those warm eyes of his. What she would love about him right now was the protective arms just like Seth’s. For a second, she thought she would trade everything to get them back – what had been lost. She wanted to trade Jake’s happiness too? If she really did, she could just grab him and kiss him, pretending that he was the boy who had stolen her heart away. That would please both of them: she would get some comfort from the reflection of the past and he would get the most fascinating white lie from her.

Then, when she suggested the two of them be friends again, she knew that she could never lie to him, or to herself. He was too good to suffer such a terrible thing. He could fix her pain. Apparently. But how long would it last when she kept on living with images of yesterday? Make a decision? Don’t make me choose because I’m greedy, Jacob – I want a bit of everything in my life, although I don’t technically need everything. She admitted, trying to hide the confusion in her voice. Just as she was about to say something more, he did something that was truly shocking in every meaning of the word “shocking”. She felt something twisting in her stomach when he lifted her face and moved closer. A shiver ran through her spine as she felt his lips on hers. So gentle. A sweet taste took over her immediately before she could put he defenses up again. Much to her surprise, Renesmee found herself kissing him back softly. A kiss in the rain – that was the kind of kiss every girl wanted. Nevertheless, it did not last too long because she eagerly pulled away before her arms could find their way to his neck. The chocolate-brown eyes were widely open, filled with anger when they stared at him. What the hell was that? Jake, why did you do that? She said, breathing heavily. How could you? Her face was reddened in embarrassment. It was her first kiss. Stupid as it sounded, but it was true. When she had still been with Seth, all they had done was laughing, teasing and blushing but never kissing. Damn it, Jake! It was my first kiss! How dare you?! She shouted angrily, or at least she made herself sound angry as she stood up. A strange feeling grew inside her. It was her first kiss and it was exciting.

tagged: jacob black <3

[jacob ephraim black]

He seemed to sigh a lot these days. It was the only thing he could do to get by. His anger was a lot more unpredictable, so in a way to contain it he had taken to sighing. He knew it was a better alternative than bursting into a wolf every couple of minutes when he found himself in a very testing situation. But yet again he found himself sighing. Yeah she was being greedy wanting both of them but sooner or later she would find out that Jacob could give her everything she wanted. He was pre-destined for her after all. If she would just give up and let him in, she would find that she did not need Seth. That Jacob could in fact give her everything her heart desired.

Jacob knew kissing her was a long shot, but he soon found himself melting into it. A small smile appearing as she kissed him back. Hope bloomed in his chest that she had finally given herself over and accepted what was meant to be. But like everything else it was crushed within seconds. Opening his eyes he pulled back to find himself under her angry yet gorgeous eyes. He knew he had no right to have forced himself upon her. That what he had just done was wrong but he could not help himself. He wanted her to see.

"I'm sorry" He hadn't even realized it was her first kiss until she had said. He had just assumed that Seth had been having a great time. "Ness, I'm sorry! I'm just stupid... I couldn't help myself." He hung his head, placing both elbows on his knees he put his head in them. He knew she was mad, but there was something else there he could feel it. He had no idea what it was so he just kept quiet. He really had wanted this to be it. For her to just say that she wanted this. But Jacobs life was never simple and never would be.

[RENESMEE CARLIE CULLEN]

Renesmee had always imagined the very first kiss of her life would happen in somewhere nice, it should be somewhere in Europe like England or France. Or at least it had to be on a rooftop under the starlight, not in the woods under a giant tree in such a heavy rain like this. Moreover, a kiss only meant something when it involves the agreements from both sides; and in her case, it had been stolen! Jacob had definitely had a death wish when kissing her. But much to her surprise, she was not as upset as she made herself seem to be. In fact, a thought crossed her mind and it made her blush terribly: she wanted to kiss him again. Had he been somewhere else out of her sight, she would have run around, cursed his name to the wind then fallen to the ground laughing so hard. She had never had such feelings – the feelings of the world spinning around and everything blurring out before her eyes, leaving one person in her sight. Stupid love songs usually described kisses as… undeniable and irresistible. She thought she had known why.

You idiot. A sigh escaped her lips as she heard him apologize. His face at the time was so pathetic that she did not want to stay mad at him anymore. You cannot go around stealing people’s first kiss like that! I don’t know how to let you know how much I want to punch you on the face right now. She stated with a frown although her tone was softened. The girl suddenly sat back down next to him, laughing quietly. I’ve always wanted a kiss on a rooftop, under the starlight. She admitted gently, not knowing why she was telling him about that. What he had done was understandable. She had made him wait for so long without a deadline. No one knew when she would get tired of her adventure and want to settle down. All that she wanted was having fun. No commitments or binding. Her wild life would go on and on happily. Placing a hand on his shoulder, she put a soft smile on her face. It was great. I was almost unable to pull away. But don’t even think about repeating it because I'm serious about punching you. Renesmee leaned to put a brief kiss on his cheek then she rose to her feet again. All she knew later was that she was running. Being kissed and running away – just like a movie. She would not forgive him, but she would consider what he had said.

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tagged: jacob black <3

[jacob ephraim black]

"I'd understand if you did..." He knew all about being punched. It was funny in a strange way being in the same situation as before but with Bella and not Nessie. And Bella had actually hit him and broke her knuckle. He did not want Nessie to break her knuckle or any other bone for that matter. But she was part vampire so perhaps she wouldn't if she did chose to hit him. His words had came out a mumble, as he had not moved his head from his hands. He could not look at her right now as he wanted to kiss her again but he knew that it was out of the question. Now that he had tasted the forbidden fruit, he wanted more.

Lifting his head slightly he smiled. He wished their first kiss could have been as special as that but as she was so stubborn and pushed him away at every turn he was not able to show her grand gestures of romance. He would give anything to be able to take her to Paris or even anywhere in Europe but she would never let him. "That could be possible..." He said softly.

Smiling again at her words he nodded in agreement. He would not push himself on her again not unless she asked for it. But his happiness quickly turned to a frown as she began to run away from him. "Ness, where are you going?!" He stood and began to follow. Not sure if she wanted him to or not, he had to follow to make sure she was okay.

[RENESMEE CARLIE CULLEN]

Jacob stated that he would have understood if she had actually punched him. And it made her smile. Her mother once told her about her wolf friend’s days of being her father’s rival. It was so surprising to know that her mother had broken her knuckle when trying to punch Jake after being kissed. Well, who dared to say that Renesmee did not take after her mother? The only difference between her and her mother was the way they chose to react in the same situation. Renesmee did not try to pour all her anger on a punch, because a part of her was not technically mad at Jake; although she would not say that she enjoyed the kiss – it was exciting but that did not mean she entirely agreed with what he had done. Poor her wolf friend. He must have taken it for granted that she and Seth had had too much fun together. Suddenly, a thought crossed her mind and confused her. Seth and her – both of them had been like children in kindergarten. Having a crush on one another and blushing whenever someone mentioned it. How cute. The holding hands and the embraces. Everything had been so sweet and memorable, yet nothing special. Renesmee was taken aback by the realization that she had never called Seth her boyfriend – usually used the term “the boy I liked” rather than “boyfriend”. They had been nothing serious. It had not been entirely a game to any of them; but she was pretty sure that none of them take it real. So…It was just a crush – her feelings for Seth? Kissing that wolf boy was something she had never thought of. All she had wanted was silly jokes from and good times together. Did it sound like what friends usually do together? She would not deny that she had got jealous of Lily when the human girl and “the boy she liked” had exchanged a few messages. Now she reckon it had been simply the fear of losing something she had been so close to – like a best friend – in Lily’s hand. It was understandable, due to her natural selfishness. What exactly had she felt about Seth?

A smile crossed her face gently as she heard what Jacob said after she had revealed to him her imagination of a perfect first kiss. Of course that could be possible. But when she finally sat on a rooftop under the starlight and kissed someone, it would be her second or third, or even fourth kiss. Thinking of that made she feel slightly angry with him again. But she chose to maintain her temper. Seeing him smile again brought relief to her soul. She truly did not want him to blame himself for kissing her, although it was apparently his fault. After all, she had given in and kissed him back. She thought of the whole “rooftop romance” thing again. If that happened, who would be standing next to her? Or who did she want to be standing next to her? Not Seth. Not any other boys she knew. The stream of thoughts brought her to one familiar face. As soon as she realized who it was, she could not stop herself from running away from Jake. Because it was his face that had popped in her head. It was such a terrible thing to think of her best friend that way. She had just claimed that she only wanted the two of them to be friends and that she never wanted a random kiss to happen again. She hurriedly speeded up when she heard his voice calling her name. She could not let him know all the silly thoughts that had wandered in her head. If his hand accidentally grabbed hers, all of those thoughts would pour into his head like a flood. And nothing was left for her but embarrassment. Away from you! She yelled aloud in response to his asking. Stop following me, Jacob. Go home. If she had to face him again, she was not sure if she could be determined about what she had demanded: being just friends.

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tagged: jacob black <3